Ice and Snow
by thatbritishkidd
Summary: Elsa battles with her own issues while struggling to take care of her sister Anna. Not really noticing that her coping mechanism might be the one thing tearing them apart. Elsanna, Incest, M for drug abuse.
1. Lots of Ice and a little bit of snow

**There's a bit of physical abuse in here, and drug dependency so if you're not cool with that you should probably turn away.**  
 **Disclaimer: I don't own Frozen or Tangled or Disney for that matter.**

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You hate being sober. You struggle to face your reality, the life you created so of course you pick up the bottle. After all you could never be with her sober. It was just easier that way. You could numb out your feelings. The feelings you get when you see her ginger hair, lying face down on the table, because she stayed up late to do homework you refused to help her with. And how nearly violent it turned. She asks, you say no. She says something underneath her voice, you turn around get mad. Lash out. Smash the glass on the floor. The glass that should've been in your hand. The glass you never should've let go. And you watch her freeze. And for the first time in your pathetic life she looks at you, in fear. You realise your mistake, and you want to apologise so badly for it. You want to get down on your knees. clean the mess up, but you can't because you're the mess. You walk off screaming, yet you could still hear her crying voice, desperately wishing for her sister's return. _The sister she used to be able to look up to the sister I used to be._ It breaks your heart seeing her like this, and you being unable to cope with the fact that _you_ caused it, you take another swig. "Sometimes I just wish I'd drown." You look forward to the day it might happen. You close your eyes, succumbing to the darkness, hoping they won't ever open again.

But they do. It's Monday. And she needs a ride. Luckily for you, her bus broke down, and her shitty boyfriend (not that you'd be any better) can't pick her up. Unluckily for you, you're craving. You want to reach out and grab something before you leave the house, but then you imagine what it would feel like to be the one she admires. The one she looks up to, aspires to be. And you remember the heart-breaking look she gives to you. _And how she's fucking petrified of me._ So, you hesitate. But it's enough. You pick up her PE bag, throw it in the boot. You're both in the car, and it's a weird feeling to you because you really don't remember the last time you ever drove sober. How you've managed to keep your license till now amazes you. There's this song on the radio that you're humming to, you don't really remember the lyrics, but Anna does. She sings it, and god her voice. Then it hits the chorus, and everything comes flooding back. You both belt out every held in feeling you didn't even know existed. Briefly, you look at her, and she has this gorgeous smile on her face. You think, _wow I made her happy._ That overwhelming sense of pride holds you, and for a moment the only thing you feel is on top of the world. But like how all good things come to an end, you reach your destination, Arendelle Sixth form. You trying to savour the moment, offers to take her PE bag to the entrance, but of course her shitty boyfriend and his gang of lads are waiting for her outside.

"Bye Elsa and thank you for the ride." How the fuck is she still thanking you after how you treat her?

"That's fine Anna."

"Yeah, Bye Elsa!" He mimics. But you're not sure if he is, so you ignore watch him place his hand firmly round your sister's shoulder. Waving him goodbye, you tell him

"take care of my sister." _Because God help you if you don't Hans._ You sit in your car and watch her leave out of view, and gradually you're plagued by this heavy thick feeling of emptiness. A void.

 _But I know how to fill that._

Anna was like the sunshine of your day, or better yet the air in your lungs. You needed her to breathe, to live. Fuck, how badly you needed her really scared you. You considered getting looked at. Obviously, this wasn't normal, but everything just got in the way. Uni, getting a job, your parents death. It was easier drowning all your issues in whatever you could get your hands on. _If my parents could see now._ You drive off to work and you never realise how painfully long and dreadful everything is sober. You really consider driving to the nearest Tesco at your lunchtime. If only you weren't located in the middle of fucking nowhere. You let out a troubled sigh and your good friend Kristoff seems to pick up. He asks

"What's on your mind?" But you brush him off. You're pretty sure he deals, but you've never asked. You get back to concentrating on your job, only to realise the amount of work you have piling up. Your boss walks in, Mr Weselton, _of course he comes the one day you're sober_. And it's intense. You watched two people get fired. Two people who worked harder than you. The only two people who worked dry on this team. It was harsh, watching them being accused of vile accusations, you know weren't true because you watched Mr Weselton do it. You watched him blame these innocent people for his actions. But you couldn't say shit, because everyone knows if you contradicted a single word that came out of his mouth, you'd lose your job _and_ your pay. And you could not afford to lose your pay, especially if Anna had plans on going to uni. Which is why you kept quiet, even though he verbally assaulted you in front of the whole team and blackmailed you into working late. At least, like a good sister, you planned on texting Anna to say you'll be working late only for you to realise you've left your phone charging in your bedroom. Your mantra for today did start off as _do it for Anna_ , it really did, but slowly you found yourself thinking and whispering _I need it._ And just like that your good day turned back into a shitty one.

You leave work and you feel like crying, you're struggling to cope, you want to throw something, at someone. You've never _felt it_ more. Like a knight in shining armour, your good friend Kristoff notices you need a break, and offers you a bag of magic snow. Because he is the great friend you need, he offers it for free. You take yourself into the bathroom and you snort. _Fuck, does that feel good._ You walk out good. Like somehow all your issues have melted away. Kristoff sees you with huge smile on your face. He says something you don't really understand, and you don't really care because you feel good. Now you're excited to get back to Anna, and you're screaming "I love my Sister!". Finally, your day is looking up. You don't really remember the drive home, but you do remember struggling to find the keys, and getting through the door. But you don't meet Anna, you meet

"Punzie? You're not Anna?"

"No of course I'm not Anna. Where the hell have you been? Anna and I have been trying to reach you since noon! You get back at eleven! Not even a text or a phone call!" You wanted to explain that you left your phone at home, but really you felt too good. You could barely notice the anger in her voice, or on her face.

"Oopsie~"

"Oopsie? Not even a proper apology? Why are your pupils so dilated? Oh, for fucks sake Elsa, are you _high?_ " You've never seen her more heartbroken for Anna. "Jesus Fucking Christ Elsa, your sister's been abused, and you turn up high?"

"Abused by whom?"

"Get out Elsa."

"You can't kick me out, I live here."

"GET OUT." So, you walk out and drive to the only other person you know you can go to, your godfather, Pabbie. You wake up feeling the effects from yesterday, the events play out repeatedly in your head. Slowly, they piece together, you rush your thank you and drive straight back home, straight back to Anna. But before you could go to her, you're met by Rapunzel. She's still infuriated with you but not as much as yesterday. She tells you "Anna has been physically abused by her boyfriend Hans."

"What?" Everything starts hitting you slowly after. You really struggle to process that your baby sister had been abused, while you the older sister, her guardian had been out of her mind drunk. All the times she had been complaining about how he wasn't treating her right, and how she just wasn't in the mood to see him. Your drunk ass thought they were small things, and that she had bigger issues like her grades. "Hans had been abusing her? Physically?" Immediately you rush up to check on her. She's sleeping soundly, but you can still see the tear stains on her face and pillow. You feel the anger stirring inside you, bubbling. Yet, you're hit with the realisation _what if Rapunzel hadn't been here?_ What would've happened to Anna then? _Rapunzel her cousin, managed to do more for her than her worthless sister._ You come back downstairs and thank Rapunzel. You thank her for being there for Anna when you couldn't, for supporting her. For putting her to bed safe. For being more use to her than her drug dependant sister. You try to reach for another bottle, then your hand stops at the fridge because you are so overwhelmed with this feeling of worthlessness. You cry. How did you fuck up this badly?

"Elsa go to rehab, please." Later that month you do. You see Anna struggling to cope, and you wanted so badly to be there for her, so you tried. You meet a group of other people, all from different backgrounds trying to get through the same problem. So, when they ask you to tell them your story, you try to put them in your shoes.

 ***Read from the Beginning***

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 **This is a piece of fiction if you couldn't tell. If this fic inspires you to try drugs, do not. They are illegal in most places and quite bad for you. Not sure what I'll do with this. I might leave it as a one shot, or I might add another set of chapters, but I don't know if I'll follow a plot.**

 **Thanks for reading.**

 **-thatbritishkidd**


	2. No ice or Snow

"Do you want something to eat? I could fry some bacon for you?" When was the last time you cooked? You really hope the skills you used to have are still there. _No point trying to coax Anna out of her room if there isn't any food._ "Anna please. Come downstairs, I've let you skip school today but please I just need to see if you're healthy." _Because I know you're not okay, and I can't do shit to change that._ You stare as she comes down the stairs. She's wearing a lose tank top that hangs off her shoulder, and shorts that are barely seen. You almost let your eyes wander to her thighs, but you don't. You turn around quickly and pretend to look for something. "I could've sworn there was some chocolate around here."

"Thank you, Elsa, but I'm not hungry." _Not hungry?_

"Anna says no to chocolate? Is the world about to end?" You finally find the bar you were looking for. "Cadbury's chocolate Oreo. Come on you can't say no to that." You sit next to her, and wave it gently in front of her. She doesn't budge. So, in a last-ditch attempt, you take a bite and moan. You're really hoping that your over reaction will get something out of her, but it doesn't. For the seventh time today, you tell yourself you really will kill this Hans. The cheerful, clumsy girl she used to be, crushed and tainted by the sick fucko-

"-Elsa, I want to change schools."

"Is this because of Hans?" She doesn't reply. You can only assume that it is. You should take this up with the school headmistress, or his parents at least.

"Maybe I should go talk to the school?"

"Please no!" Her arm is grabbing you, fiercely. Almost like she's scared you'll abandon her. "We talked about this, don't report anything please otherwise you'll just make things worse for me."

"You can't keep skipping school Anna!" You can hear your voice reaching higher octaves. You wanted to be patient with her, not get mad with her. _Calm down Elsa, getting mad will scare her off._ "I'm sorry, I'm sorry." You manage to apologise this time. "I'm just, really worried about you. You spent so much time, trying to get your grades up, I don't want you to miss out on that great big chance of you going to uni just because of some twat who really didn't deserve you." You see her wince at the memory. "You know what? How about we spend some time in and just watch Disney movies and then we could go out for a takeaway for dinner?" Instead of giving you a vocal reply she lies her head on your boobs. Your breath hitches for a second, but you focus. And that's the only thing you focus on, because if you focused on anything else you mind would wander and if a single sign gave away that you had a crush on her, you'd be fucked. Before the movie plays, you text your secretary to let her know you'll be taking a sick day from work today. You know Mr Weselton would give you an earful for this one, but this time around, Anna came first. _She has to._ You wrap your arm around her and stroke her gently. Trying to console her. "Do you feel better?"

"A little." _Fuck Hans._

You get to work to the next day. Instead of going through files you are searching up schools in your county. You email all of them to see if their specification matches with Anna's subjects, because the last thing you want is for Anna to repeat a year. _Because of some dickhead named Hans._

"What you are looking at?" Your good friend Kristoff asks.

"Schools. My sister is thinking about moving."

"Anna?"

"Yes, Anna."

"Didn't you say she went to Arendelle Sixth form? Isn't that like a grammar school? Don't tell me she's getting bullied." He genuinely looks concerned, that's a first.

"I don't know Kristoff. She doesn't really talk to me much anymore." _Not like she used to in the first place._ "I just want to give her a good chance at life. It's what our parents would have wanted."

"You're such a noble and kind sister." _If only you knew Kristoff._

"Haven't you got work to do?"

"Come one, it's almost lunch." He leaves you, knowing this as a signal that you don't want to talk. Distractedly, you get back to your work, but there was only so much you could get done while constantly checking and replying to your emails. Eventually, your day ends and thank God for that because it felt incessant. You get in your car ready to go home but your mind drifts, you remember Anna, the pile up of work, and how you were unable to find a school that matched with Anna. You want to give up and melt away. It's hard, really hard. You can see yourself putting the keys in, ready to switch on the engine. Even if you do it subconsciously you know where you're headed. _No this isn't what I wanted to do. Do it for Anna. Do it for Anna._ You take a drawn-out breath. Your head thumps on the steering wheel. _You've been through it before. Just concentrate you spaz._ You stay stuck there for an unbearably long time. Not till the feeling passes, because it never does, but till it dulls. Till you could ignor- knock knock. In the corner of your eye, you see a large blonde man. _Kristoff, the fuck does he want now?_ Regrettably, your window winds down.

"The team is going to the pub, want to come?" Slowly, you raise your head. For a while you contemplated it. And oh, the temptation. Why wouldn't you? Going for a drink with the team, something that rarely occurred. You could have one, and then stop. Exercise your self-control. But of course, you also knew that if you did have one, you could go down that deadly spiral you were trying so hard, so very hard to avoid. But you knew yourself, when it came to self-control you could do it. The people at rehab would never know. But before you could say yes, an image of Anna appeared in your head. Not a nice image of her smiling, _when was the last time that happened?_ An image of the scared, lonely girl she looked like now. An image of the girl you forced her to be because you couldn't stop yourself. _Great self-control I had._

"I can't. I need to go to rehab. Then I have to pick up Anna." The shit you did for Anna. Or better yet, the shit you didn't do for Anna.

"Oh shit, my bad I completely forgot." _Don't lie you prick._ After a painful trip to the rehab centre, you open the door to find it unlocked. Before you get to call out Rapunzel's name you hear laughing around the corner. _Anna's laugh?_ You were right. It was Anna's laugh. She was just sitting there, watching tv, with Rapunzel next to her, also laughing.

"Oh, Elsa you're back! When did you get in?"

"Just no-" You're ambushed by a _smiling_ ginger. _What?_ Her arms are wrapped around your waist. You look down, and for the first time in fucking forever, a little bit of colour has returned to her eyes. It's not all the way but you'll take it. "Hello Anna." You slowly wrap an arm around her, rubbing her shoulder gently. And you'd love to listen to what Rapunzel has been saying but Anna hasn't been this happy or this close to you since - well you can't answer that. You only come back down to earth, when Anna pulls away from you and walks upstairs.

"We're speaking privately remember?" She says a little bit frustrated.

"Yes sorry. I just haven't seen Anna this happy like, before?"

"Well, Anna and I have been going over schools for her to move to, there's this one in Corona that I've been looking at. I used to tutor this girl, who takes similar subjects like Anna and so far, everything we've gone over is the same, with maybe one or two differences."

"Corona? Isn't that a little far off?"

"Well yes, but I have a little art 'workplace' Anna could stay in while she goes there."

"By herself?"

"No, I'll stay with her. I know Corona might be a little far off for you." Your first thought was to say no. But the more you thought about it, the more you realised how unhappy Anna was with you, and how happy she is with Rapunzel. Even if she'll be maybe a couple of hours away. _Be a good sister to Anna and make a good decision for once._ You knew Rapunzel could offer her anything you could plus more.

"Yeah okay. It's what Anna wanted." _It's the least she deserves._

"One slight issue. It's a private school."

"How much does it cost?" Rapunzel shows you the price, and it's not a nice figure. "I don't suppose they do scholarships this late in the year."

"Maybe you could apply for a bursary?"

"I think with my job it should be fine." _More like I'll manage._ "It's not like I'm spending a ridiculous amount of money on alcohol anymore." _I may have to stop a few luxuries but for Anna, I'll do it._ You would do anything for Anna.


	3. Cold and frosty

The house hasn't felt the same without her. It's quiet, cold, dull even. The problem is you feel it. You sit there staring at her bedroom door mindlessly. Contemplating, if you should go in, and soak up the remnants of her scent, and stain it with yours. But if you went in there, would you miss her more? Would you leave? All those seemed like dangerous risks. Risks with outcomes you wouldn't be able to cope with right now. Especially without alcohol. You find yourself downstairs, with all motivation drained from you. You want to close your eyes and imagine Anna being here. But you don't. You stop yourself. You tell yourself you need to get used to her being away from you. How are you going to manage when she goes off to university? You'll get used to it. You know you can. The feeling will fade, and you'll be fine. But you've been saying this for the past two months, and it's only getting worse. Your head rests on the table, tucked into your arms.

"I miss her." You whisper gently. If you dare say it louder, your heart would hear. You want to cry, but you don't you hold yourself back so hard you don't breathe. This is what you signed up for, for Anna's happiness. "For Anna." That was the beginning, of when you first started blocking in your emotions and immersing yourself into the cold.

Another sun falls, another sun rises, and you get out of bed and into work. Time moves much slower for you. But you ignore it. You focus. You get your job done, and for the first time you get your job done early. You notice Kristoff hasn't really been keeping up with his workload, so you offer to relieve some of the pressure. He accepts. You look at him for longer and you notice the feint circles around his eyes. You ask him if everything's okay. He doesn't reply at first, so you repeat yourself.

"Yeah, sorry just a bit of trouble with home life." He says. It's not like you but you hesitantly offer,

"If you want to talk to me about it, you can." You watch him pause and think. Then just as he opens his mouth, as if on cue Mr. Weselton walks in, and the whole room because dead silent. You both get back to your work and keep your head down, but you can still sense him and his pompous attitude striding across the room.

"Every time I come into this place, it stinks! It smells like shit! Good for nothing, lazy pieces of shit! All of you!" His arms fly out and papers soar into the air. You could see a worker get frightened and become stiff because that was their work. " I AM LOSING MONEY!" he screams. The veins in his neck look so close to bursting, and so are your ear drums. But you keep your eyes focused on your screen. _Just do the work, just do the work._ You can't afford to lose your job. "YOU!" You see his finger less than two centimetres away from you. You somehow refrain jumping, but you freeze. "YOU HAVE BEEN SELLING PRIVATE COMPANY INFORMATION BEHIND MY BACK!" _What? No, I haven't! Fuck Elsa, say something!_ But you didn't. You couldn't. You sat the with your mouth part ajar, but no sound came out. "I want you the fuck out of here. You're fired!"

He grabs you by your arm, and throws you out, but you just let it happen. You don't even try to stop him. You go with the motion, you even get your keys out of your pocket, unlock your car, get inside sit and shut the door. You just sit there till the noise in your head fades. Then it all finally sets in. You lost your job. _I lost my job. I lost my job._

"Fuck!" You scream and throw your fists at your steering wheel. "No!" BANG "H-how" BANG "am" BANG "I" BANG "going" BANG "to support Anna now! Fuck!" Just like that, your whole world came crashing down. How were you going to keep her there? Ignoring the house bills, and food expenses you still don't have enough money for next term. You desperately needed this month's pay check. The panic slowly started setting in. _What am I going to do? What am I going to do?_ You hadn't felt like this since you found out Hans had been abusing your sister. Your fingers gripped so tightly around the steering wheel your knuckles closely resembled white. _Anna wouldn't even be in a private school if it wasn't for Hans._ You never would be apart from Anna.

"Hans." You mutter dangerously under your breath. Trying to place a curse on him, but you knew that wouldn't be enough. So, you finally decide to drive off to Arendelle Sixth form where you park and wait.

There he is. All by himself with his douchebag haircut, and ginger sideburns. You get out of your car, storm right up to him. "Hans!" He's shocked to see you, but astounded when you grab his shoulders and shove him against the fence.

"What the fuck!"

"How dare you fucking abuse my sister you piece of shit!"

"Abuse?" He cackles in your face. "She was practically begging me for it. I'm glad to see her shitty alcoholic sister has come to her rescue two months after I dumped her pathetic arse. Took you that long to get sober?" Your fist jets through the air and strikes him right in his mouth. You see the blood on his lip, but you can tell he's more astounded and angry that you hit him, than hurt. "You that thirsty for a drink? I'm sure I can get one of my mates to hook you up with one."

"You're a piece of shit."

"And you're a shitty alcoholic whose sister was on her knees asking me to let her stay at my place each night. "

"You're lying."

"Am I? How do you think I know?" Before you could reply a gang of students appeared in your peripheral vision. You fled back to your car and drove home. Hans' words still ringing in your head infuriating you more and more. You start driving more recklessly, almost crashing, twice. You get home. Slam the door shut. And cry.

 _I don't know what I'm going to do._ Well you must figure out something, you're going to see Anna this weekend. Or you'll have to tell her.

The weekend came. In fact, you're sitting opposite her in a random cafe watching as she drinks her milkshake. Rapunzel stands watching over you in a faraway corner, probably waiting for Anna so she can drive her home. To Anna's new home. It's weird thinking that your homes aren't the same anymore. The Elsa's home and Anna's home aren't the same house. But you hold in the tears. You listen to her drone on about her new school life. She loves it you can tell. And it's breaking your heart.

"I've made some new friends too! One of them is called Olaf! And my teachers are saying I've settled in well, too well. But they think I'll be accepted into the top ten universities! "

"I'm sure you can Anna, I always knew you were capable."

"But to have teachers believe in me? Wow." _I can't tell her._

"That's great Anna, truly it is."

"What about you Elsa? How have things been in Arendelle?" _Shit without you._

"Thing, t-they're great. Very lonely though, I'm just missing you a lot."

"Aw I miss you too, it's a shame you can't be with us in Corona." You want to hold her, to hug her before you leave. But the guilt weighs too much. You can barely look her in the eyes when you say goodbye. So, when the words leave your mouth they sound bitterly cold, and you know Anna felt it because she hesitates to say her goodbye.

The drive home felt endless. It wasn't a place you wanted to face. Yet, you pulled up to your driveway only to see Kristoff standing outside with one hand holding his phone and the other holding a bottle.

"Kristoff?" You get out of your car and pull out your house keys from your pocket. Kristoff sighs a breath of relief, probably from seeing you. You have no idea how long he's been waiting there.

"Elsa! I thought you weren't home."

"What are you doing here?"

"I brought some champagne, non-alcoholic of course."

"You've come to celebrate me losing my job?" Sceptically, you ask.

"What? No! I didn't mean it like that. I wanted to cheer you up." He follows you inside. You pull a chair out for him and he sits.

"Let me tell you how my week has been Kristoff. I got fired from my job a couple of days ago. I have no money to pay for my sister's school which is the only thing giving her a future right now, after her shitty alcoholic sister fucked up and her shitty ex-boyfriend abused her! Now I risk putting my sister out of school because I can't find a job that pays enough in time! But I have my best friend Kristoff! Caring Kristoff who brought a bottle of non-alcoholic champagne that will fix all my problems!" You didn't even realise the bottle was in your hand when you smashed it on the floor.

"I should get some real alcohol to drown myself in, seeing as Anna's sober sister has failed her," Kristoff's stands up and grabs your arm, forcefully, quicker than you can blink, "or maybe something harder. Is that why you came? To deliver something?"

"N-no actually I came to tell you I know a guy who's looking for someone to do a job for him. I could put in your name, the pay is decent enough, and I'm sure you could get paid soon enough before a school term ends."

"What sort of job?"

* * *

 **This whole give Elsa a girlfriend thing,**

 **the reason frozen is such a hit is because it's a tale of two sisters. It isn't your conventional princess falls in love with prince magic story. The fact the its family over romance. Now they want to add romance. Hm? As an Elsanna supporter I can't just let that happen.**

 **Can you?**

 **the only girlfriend Elsa should have is Anna.**

 **-** Spoken like a true shipper.

 **After that short rant, I basically have an idea of the plot but no idea on how to piece it together, so if I don't update this fic it's because I still haven't worked it out yet.**

 **I rushed, it's late im tired.**

 **I don't own frozen tho, which is such a shame.**

 **Review and let me know how I'm doing it's the only way I know if you like it.**

 **Thanks Anon who reviewed, actually means a lot to me, and I will do my best.**


	4. Black Ice and Hail

"Just wait here, I'm going to let him know we've arrived." Kristoff tells you. You nod. You stand, there's a chair but you're too anxious to sit down. When was the last time you felt like this? You curse yourself for thinking it, because the last time you felt anything you didn't like you drank. Back then, it worked, short term. How badly you regret it, because now you have no experience in dealing with these situations. Sweat slowly forms in the palm of your hands, it's an unfamiliar and uncomfortable feeling. _Calm down Elsa, just think of something else._ Nothing helped to distract you from the nerves tensing inside of you, apart from your sister Anna. You remember the joy she expressed, from her new school. The one you pay for. The cute face she pulls when she drinks her milkshake. The time she spilt it on herself, and you wiped it down, and your hand grazed against her boobs. You knew you shouldn't think of it, but it helps soothe you. The last thing you want to do is upset your new boss because you were too fucking nervous. You relax in your perverted thoughts of Anna, until a cold wave rushes over you. _What if he ends up being like Weselton? What if he ends up being worse?_ The sheer thought paralyses you. Slowly your breathing regulates, as Anna creeps back in. _I'm here for Anna._

The door swings open, and a giant - fuck he was a mammoth of a man, appears. _Is that the boss?_ He must both duck and walk in sideways to fit through the seemingly small and narrow doorway. After him comes Kristoff, "he's coming, don't fuck this up." He says. You nod to him, but your focus returns on the giant. He's bald with an enormous jaw, and even larger arms. His eyes glare at you, quickly, you focus your attention back at Kristoff. Kristoff notices your newfound interest on mountain of a man. "That's Marshal Mallow, he's friendly once you get to know him. So friendly everyone just calls him Marshmallow for short."

Another man walks in, he's much smaller, but still much larger than you and Kristoff. He's wearing a suit, it looks very eccentric due to its green and oak designs. You assume it's designer, but it seems a little tight on him. "That's your boss." Kristoff whispers in your ear.

He stands behind the desk, looking through a couple of papers. The more you think about it, the more he looks familiar. "Elsa Winters ja?" _That accent! I've heard it from somewhere before!_

"Y-yes." He reaches out to shake your hand. His firm grip takes you by surprise. The intimidation seeks in slowly as you notice the huge difference in hand size, you desperately try to fight it off with thoughts of Anna, but

"I need you to do a trade for me? I have a partner in the south, who's being a little less complying." Then the memory hits you. This was Oaken! Oaken from Oaken's trading post and Sauna. But this wasn't the trading post. The trading post was a whole lot smaller, and friendly. This place was dark and empty, and solitude. "I'll need you to drop off a parcel for me and send a message." Shuffling through papers, he exasperates "Oh no, I seem to have... misplaced them." He leaves the room and you use that as an opportunity to ask Kristoff -

"- You got me a job at Oaken's trading post?"

"Err, not quite." You look at him for a moment, and he has this sheepish look on his face.

"What do you mean?" The anger grows in your voice.

"Well you see, Oaken's not just the owner of a trading post, he's also my boss, for you know my underground job!"

"You mean to tell me he's a drug lord! You got me a job with a drug lord!" You've got to get out of here. You've got to escape. You can't stay here, you were supposed to avoid drugs! What if Anna found out! Worse, what if the police knew! You'd be arrested, sent to prison then who would support Anna! How would she pay for university! "What the FUCK Kristoff!" And now Oaken's seen your face, and this enormous man to your side. How the fuck were you going to get out of this?

"Calm down! Look, he's a nice guy!" You wanted to laugh at that. Nice guys don't own drug organisations! You could barely even believe this was the same Oaken. The panic and anxiety were slowly settling in, you felt your throat retching. "You know that!" Before Kristoff could say any further, and before anything from your stomach came up another man walks through the door. _Hold it together Elsa._

"Kristoff? Glad to see you're back soon! I see you've brought a friend!" You couldn't believe your eyes when you saw it. The man who just walked in was the same man who looked after your sister when you were unable to. He took care of her without asking for anything in return, and he did all this even while his wife was struggling with her health. "Elsa, I haven't seen you in a while, how's Anna?"

"Kai?" He flashes you a gentle smile. "S-she's fine. She's moved to a new school in Corona." His hand is out, indicating you to shake it. You go to reach but he pulls you into a hug. "You're looking so much healthier now. That's good."

"But what are you doing here? T-this is a drug-"

"Surprise!" He steps away from you, and you watch Kristoff hand him some money. "This isn't really a criminal organisation Elsa, it's more of a community. You see, everyone here involved is here because they have family they care about that they would put first. You see me, I'm here because I need to take care of my wife. Marshmallow over there is here because he's the only one supporting his brother, which is like you. I assume you're here because of Anna." He notices the confusion on your face and continues "Kristoff told me you might be coming. Oaken does it to support his family." His voice goes down to a gentler tone, it's soothing. "Surviving in this world is difficult. When you think you finally have everything working together, something comes out of nowhere, and you find yourself struggling to take care of it, and everything just gets worse and worse." You experienced that all too well. "Which is why we do anything to look after the ones we care about. There's so many of us here like this, and we do what we can. It isn't all active drug dealing, sometimes we babysit each other's kids. Sometimes we donate to the school or attend birthday parties. You know, anything to help. That's why you're here isn't it?"

Kai was right. The reason you were here was because you cared about Anna. It doesn't make you any different from them. You could feel your heart beat slowing down, and your shoulders starting to relax. You didn't even know you were that tense. "You're right, it is why I'm here." You cared about Anna enough to do help a drug lord. Desperately, you've wished these feelings would go away or simmer down, because then you would've been able to tell Anna the truth. Then you wouldn't have been involved with a crime syndicate, that seems to have infested Arendelle's roots. Then, you would've lived your life completely oblivious. But they haven't gone away, they only got worse. And they keep getting worse. You struggle to keep her out of your head. Fuck, sometimes you even smell her. And sometimes, that really scares you.

Oaken walks back into the room. He hands you and Kristoff a thin stack of papers. "Those are the instructions, read them. There's the location and address. Once you're done, burn it. That vhould be all." It was only one job anyways.

You spend the journey there attempting to settle your nerves. It doesn't help that your sitting in the front, scrolling through pictures of Anna, while Kristoff drives and Marshmallow stares over your shoulder, with a fixed lour. "That your sister?" He grunts.

"Yeah, I hear you have a brother?" _What a weak attempt at making conversation._ At least it might help dispel the thick tension in the air. He grunts again.

"His name, Olaf." _Olaf? Did Anna talk about an Olaf?_

"He doesn't happen to go to school in Corona, does he?" You crane your neck to watch him nod as a reply. "My sister goes to school with him!"

"I know. He talks a lot about her." It's weird how much you had in common with Marshmallow.

"How long have you been in this -" pick your words carefully "- community for?"

"One year." _That's not very long._ You expected him to have been there for at least a decade. He looked like a mafia member minus all the tattoos, but, he was just like you. He was just trying to take care of his brother, like you were trying to take care of Anna.

"We're here." Kristoff mutters. You calm your nerves, reading through the instructions one more time before burning them with a lighter Marshmallow handed you. _I can do this. For Anna._ You kept that mantra spinning in your head. Even when the trade becomes hostile. Even when you were singled out. Yet, somehow you were still standing. Somehow you looked fine. Outwardly, you were calm, stoic. Inwardly, you were on the verge of collapsing, then again, you always had been. You manage to talk him into letting you all walk freely with Oaken's briefcase. He even looked, intimidated.

"Jesus fucking Christ Elsa that was awesome! I knew you were right for this!"

"Shut the fuck up Kristoff. Let's just get home." Just as you thought everything was going fine, two tall muscular men, with brown hair, and a menacing glare appear with knives. Shar, ragged, ready to kill, knives.

"Hand it over!" Just as you take time to think, Marshmallow roars -

"- who are you!"

"We work for the man you just dealt with, and you fuckers have been leaking to the police about our position."

"You thought you could get away with that?" The other, shorter man spits angrily. You watch Marshmallow stand in front of you, like a shield. You don't know how long your heart freezes for. The knives approach slowly, but not slow enough. Marshal's arm pushes you back. You barely move, as if your feet are firmly frozen to the ground. You wanted to check if they were, because for that moment you couldn't feel a thing. Nothing.

"We have to get this briefcase back to the car, Marshmallow will handle this." Kristoff tells you. He's grabbing your arm tugging you, looking at you frantically, but you don't move. You stay there, staring.

"GO AWAY!" The words split through your head. It's only once Marshmallow roars, that you feel your senses returning and you run away with Kristoff. You try focusing on your head, but you struggle, with the events frozen in your mind. You keep half-breathing, and the pain builds up quickly, yet you don't stop. On top of all the fear and the pain, you keep seeing Anna flashing through your mind. So even when the pain in your chest becomes unbearable, you run. Fuck you sprint. You couldn't die today. Not with those school fees to pay. Not with Anna depending on you. Not when she was finally happy. You couldn't die when Anna was smiling again, laughing again. It was the only thing that made your life bearable, fuck it was the only thing you lived for. She's the only reason you're still alive. If not for Anna and her caring nature you would've given up on life a long time ago. Anna was the sun in your day. Fuck she was the summer in your year. Life without Anna was like a never-ending winter. Always cold, always dark.

You somehow make it to the car in one piece. Your heartbeat thumping your head furiously. You sit in the car with your chest heaving, and throat screaming. What if I got stabbed? What if I died? What's Anna going to do without me? Those were the type of thoughts swarming through your head. You didn't even notice Kristoff fumbling about on his second phone, desperately trying to communicate with Oaken.

Just as you were slowly coming back to your senses. That's when you heard it. A gunshot. "Marshmallow!" The thought was so loud in your head you spoke it. Then, the thought of Anna losing you was compared to Olaf losing his brother. Almost instantaneously, more gunshots followed. You hadn't even realised that you had stepped out of the car. Kristoff's calls didn't even come close to your ears. Even when you saw one of the men groaning loudly on the pavement, dipped in a pool of his own blood. It was only after following a fainter, lighter trail of blood drops, that you realised you had your fingers gripped tightly around a knife. _Where did this come from?_ A scream split the air. _That belonged to Marshal._ Keeping the knife in your hand, you run towards his direction. But you're gripped by the thought "what if that was me, instead of him." You hoped that someone would come to rescue you even if the odds that a knife would win a gun fight were close to death. But that wasn't the real reason you ran to Marshal. Deep down, you couldn't make sense of the situation. None of it really felt real, even if you knew you could've died a minute ago. It all felt too surreal.

 _I just need to get to Marshmallow. Then get him out._ Behind a car you see him crawling. Putting the knife in your pocket, you run towards him. He looks shocked to see you, but before he speaks he grimaces, and you notice the small pool of blood coming out from both his leg and his torso. _Fuck!_ You do the first thing you could think of. He was much too large and heavy for you to pick up, and you weren't sure he could walk. But it didn't stop you from dragging him, through his grimaces and grunts, out of danger. The relief you felt when you see Kristoff pull up with the car. He helps you put Marshal in the backseat. You sit in the front, leaning back to help. You can tell in the side of your eye that Kristoff is panicking, horrendously, while driving. His driving isn't straight, and he swerves at every curve. You don't recognise the roads Kristoff takes you down. It was the last thing on your mind. All you could see when you stared outside the window was the faces of the men, the blood, the almost dead body. The bloodied knife that's now sitting on your lap. Then the sun appears from behind a cloud, and you finally feel it. _Warmth._ Everything you felt or thought previously vanishes and is replaced by Anna. You struggle to remember what Kristoff said you were doing, you feel yourself succumbing to the blur that surrounds you. Your last coherent thought, being about Anna.

"I know he said I should keep talking to you Elsa, but I'm running out of things to say. At least we're back in Arendelle now. Once we get Marsh dropped off, we can get a coffee or something?" You look at him confusedly. _Arendelle? When did I get here?_ Slowly, today's events replay in your head, but only in jagged pieces. "That's a better response, I guess." Two people come to collect a bandaged Marshal from the car. What happened earlier was real. Marshal almost died. I almost died. Half-aware, you follow Kristoff out the car. "Look Kai, she's had this stone-cold face, for the whole time!" Kai looks at you concernedly.

"Poor Elsa, she's struggling to cope."

"I'm worried about her."

"Take her home, and don't leave her side." Eventually he does. You put your keys through the lock, a menial task, but you notice an unwelcome presence inside.

"Why are you still here Kristoff?"

"I'm not leaving you by yourself. You've been through a lot and I don't want you doing something you might regre-"

"-Like what? Drink? Snort some cocaine? Well the time for regret is long over Kristoff because I fucking stabbed someone!" With his head down, Kristoff stands there frozen, shaking. The same Kristoff, who had been your friend for years, and had always been an ear for you to vent on. The same Kristoff who came to your house to look after you because he knew you weren't okay, you fucking yelled at. "I'm sorry, I just- I just need some space."

"I get it. Totally." He leaves. Only once he leaves, that you remember how lonely the house is by yourself, and how you still haven't adjusted to Anna being gone. You do the one thing you can to cope. You walk upstairs, open Anna's bedroom door, and you fall on her bed. It works a little bit. You fully immerse yourself into everything Anna. But it could never compare to the real thing. _I miss her._ Tears had already started building up. _And she would still be here! If it wasn't for fucking Hans!_

The next day Kristoff comes to pick you up. Apparently, he doesn't trust you enough to drive; you don't argue. You just want to collect the money and pay Anna's school. Rather than Oaken, handing you money it's Kai. You use that as an opportunity to tell Kai, that you were attacked because someone had been reporting back to the Police about dealings. To your surprise Kai already knows. "It's Kristoff." He says nonchalantly. "There's no way an organisation the size of Arendelle would work without having a few leeway's from the police. In fact, Kristoff's brother Sven works on the force, so everything works out quite nicely."

"I'd like to take my leave now." Kristoff interjects. Maybe he's trying to avoid you because he knows you'll get angry. But Kai's casual response to the matter made you realise _what if this is just the norm._

"There's no price on life, so no amount of money is worth dying for, but thank you for going back to save Marshmallow. I'm sure his brother would appreciate him being alive, maybe even more than we do. So, if there's anything we can do for you Elsa, just know that you're always welcome here."

You should've gotten out of the drug life cleanly. You should've thanked Kai, and then left. Get out of the criminal business. You had way too much at stake. Once was enough already. You should've looked for a job like any other normal sane person. But before you leave, he offers you something your anger-filled, spite-stricken self couldn't refuse. "If you need our services, like bills paid - or someone needs to be taught a lesson, we can do that for you."

"Wait, really, you'd help me get revenge on someone?"

"Yes, does anyone come into mind?" Almost too quickly you replied.

"The man that abused my sister. " _Hans._

* * *

 **This chapter was much longer than I had originally planned it to be. I had to split it in two because there was no way I could get all of that done and posted at a relatively suitable time. You might be happy to know I have a plan for where this story is headed! Woo no loose endings. (If I even finish it, doesn't sound nice saying it out loud but it's a possibility).**

 **Thanks to everyone who's followed, favourited and reviewed. Especially the reviews you might not realise it but they help the story progress, (other than motivating me.)**

 **This was a hard chapter to write. It might be a little bit difficult to follow. I did think about clarity but we're seeing the scenes through Elsa's perspective. There was only so much I could push at my current skill level. Please let me know how this chapter went, because it was hard to write.**

 **Long live the Queen.**


	5. Stalactites and Stalagmites

"BE QUIET!" A half-finished scream splits the air. Hans is here. In the room across, probably tied up, and begging. He had been walking home late, at maybe around one-ish in the morning, most likely drunk, most likely kicked out from some party he'd been attending. Practically offering himself up to them. The cunt who had taken his manipulative hands to break your sister, was there in the room across you, screaming and crying. _Just like what he did to Anna. They would do to him._ Rightfully so. Every single howl that spilled out from his repulsive existence was a fucking melody. A melody that you listened to on repeat, and really fucking enjoyed.

"P-Please" another pitiful cry slips out from him. It's almost rhythmic.

"I'd hate to be in there right now." Kristoff awkwardly jokes. You don't respond because deep down, you wish you could be in there right now. You wish you could've watched that permanently fixed smug face crumble into the miserable state that he was in now. You could hear him whimpering just in the room across. If only the door was open. _I'll show him what it means to beg._ All that time Anna had spent suffering. All that time she spent, crying for your help. Wincing, you hear her voice in fragments begging for you to 'help' her. To stop it. To stop him.

Suddenly, as if your wish has been answered, BANG, the door swings open. Out walks Kai, another man in long robes, and a thick stench. The man then slams a half-filled bottle of vodka on a small table to his side. You might've been able to tell that this was getting too much for Kristoff to handle as he couldn't pry his eyes off the bottle. Probably, trying to avoid making eye contact with either men, you, or looking at anything torture related at all. But as Kristoff was staring at the label, you were staring at the blind-folded boy half-lying on the floor in his own comfortable lake of fluids. That's when Kai hands you a pair of delicate white gloves and takes you in. You notice the shiver through Hans' spine as he hears footsteps returning. You almost chuckled at the thought of a piece of shit lying on the ground. _Right where he fucking should be._

You almost jumped from happiness when Kai told you to get involved. As if watching Kai wasn't enough. Surely, there must've been some part of you that was scared, or nervous at the least. But if there was, she was ignored. You got so happy grabbing his ginger locks, tugging them by the roots, stretching his scalp. Only to be met with the disappointment of not seeing the crippling fear expressed, in the piss dripping down his trouser leg, in his eyes. And as if Kai is a mind reader he walks out of the room, giving you that opportunity to lift his blindfolds off. He invites Kristoff with him, but he stays there frozen, as if in some blizzard he's unable to escape, watching from the side lines.

The moment Kai confirms his leave with a loud BANG of the door shutting, you lift the blindfolds off Hans' face. "Elsa? This was you!" As if he had some remaining courage still inside him he questions you in a weak voice. You don't even have the energy to respond. All you keep imagining are his hands round your sister's neck pinning her against a wall. So, you wrap your fingers tightly against his, crushing him to the floor. You can see him trying to splutter out words to appeal to you. But the image in your mind of Anna - the image in your mind of Anna against the floor desperately trying to resist his hands up her bra was stronger. That's when you see those green eyes. Those petrified teal screaming at you. You pause.

You could only half-picture those images of Anna. It was so real, in your mind, but so hazy. Almost as if - it was a memory. But the worst part of that 'memory' was that it was your hands round her neck, wringing it. Squeezing it, feeling her life pulse against your palms. Your tongue feeling the entrance to her throat - fuck - you realised you couldn't handle this. Ignoring Kristoff's warnings, you reached for the vodka bottle. It was a bad idea, but you could FEEL her. You had to get rid of this thought. Venomous green eyes watched you grip the neck of the bottle. The words 'shitty alcoholic sister' swirled through your mind like the vodka down your throat.

Oh, the words you could've said to him then. Instead, you pick him up then smash him against the floor. _Does this turn you on Hans?_ What you hadn't realised was the more you punished Hans, the more you struggled to suppress those dark thoughts. The more you became disgusted, the more you drank, the more aggressive Hans' abuse became. Yet, even when Hans' noises silenced, even when your gloves had stained sangria. You didn't stop. There was no little voice in your head saying you might kill this boy. You just wanted to see him suffer. And suffer. And suffer. And suffer. And suffer.

It was only when Kristoff took a swig of the remaining vodka, that you were thrusted back into the real world. The rage you were completely immersed in, dissipated. Kristoff with his lips stiffly sealed walks out of the room, before you follow him, you whisper into Hans' ear. "Don't ever fuck with my sister, or anyone else again. Unless you want to meet me again." He lets out a feeble whimper in agreement.

You didn't know what was more unsettling, the fact that Kristoff had been watching you for the entire time, or the fact that he stood there silently. _That's a first. What's he thinking of?_ Patiently, Kai stands there with a disposable bag for you to put the gloves in. You relished in the sudden wave of satisfaction as you took the gloves off. _This was better than any drink. Seeing Hans pay for what he did._ You almost missed Kai's words of approval. "Wow, well we'll take care of the rest. If you'd be happy to take on any other jobs for us, we'd be happy to have you. Of course, you'd be paid." You look at the picture of Anna on your lock screen. For the first time in fucking forever, you could be proud of yourself, knowing that Anna would never be hurt. And you weren't just making yourself proud, you were making Anna proud. You were being a good fucking sister. Why would you ever want to give that up? Plus, it wouldn't hurt to be saving up money for next term, until you could get a proper job. So, you take up that offer. And that's how you got yourself caught up in the drug world.

* * *

 **Bonus Scene:**

Hello I'm Olaf! I'm waiting for the teacher, so we can start registration, and then I can go to art. The ginger girl to my right with pigtails is Anna. She just joined not so long ago. She's also from Arendelle like me! I think she's cool. She says I give the best hugs. But that's only because I know everyone needs a little bit of love at some point. Sometimes she comes to me for friendship advice and I tell her all the nice things but everyone.

At breaks I like to go outside and smell flowers, with all the other cute nature animals. Ooo like this ladybug! But most of the time I must stay indoors, because it's cold, and I don't want to make my older brother Marshmallow worry. Which is why my favourite season being Summer. Because you can just relax in the summer sun and let off steam. Which is one thing I like about Corona, it's really sunny. Unlike Arendelle, which is very cold most of the time. But that means you can stay inside and snuggle. Snuggling's the best in winter.

I think Anna's favourite season is summer, but she says she misses winter a lot because it reminds her of home -

"- Olaf Mallow."

"Yes Miss!" That's the register. Time to say goodbye!

* * *

 **I hope you enjoyed that chapter. Thanks to Foxtrot for reviewing, really made my day! Hope yours are going great.**

 **-thatbritishkidd**


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